This time of year...

sucks. To put it lightly. This is probably the busiest 3 weeks of my school year, and I'm definitely not looking forward to it. Thank goodness no one in my apartment drinks coffee except for me and occasionally Jake's girlfriend when she stays over, but I'm still running low on creamer. Anyways...

I spent about 2 hours after work tonight looking through random youtube videos and stumbleupon stuff. I know, really productive right? I absolutely cannot wait for summer... Boating, beach volleyball, beers, and oh yeah.. that little thing called interning. Sweet.

I'm seriously considering switching my focus over to journalism rather than sociology. I enjoy both, but I've really been into sports media and sports writing the last few months. The production stuff I'm doing for 80's babies and Bash Events has really got me thinking if it's possible to use these skill sets in a viable job... I mean I know I taught myself, but everyone seems to be impressed with my work. It's nice getting paid to do it as well finally. We'll see where things go, I mean I still have another year in Iowa City, and that's going to consist of internships, and mostly a frantic decision making process on whether I should do grad school, or brave the storm that is the job market right now and attempt to find a big boy job. Only time will tell.

In the meantime, enjoy this little jewel. If you know me, you know of my love for all things acoustic - and that means John Mayer is one of my favorites. Although this song doesn't have a lot of lyrics, the movie it's associated with and the simple line of "say what you need to say" has so much power in it's own right. Anyways, enjoy. Back to working on the 6 pager that's due tomorrow.

Know what you deserve

This will be a shortie since I'm tired and have a long day tomorrow, but simply put - don't settle. I've been coming to find more and more lately that my forgiving nature can be a fault. My Dad had a few great nuggets of wisdom he shared with me over the phone a few weeks back, and it seems pretty fitting right now.

(i'm paraphrasing a bit, but you get the idea.)

"Don't go out of your way to make an effort for some people, sometimes it's just not worth it. Anyone that treats you differently when they're drunk than they normally would, or makes you their second or fall back option when their first doesn't work out isn't worth wasting your time. Now I'm not saying don't be friendly, or to disrespect these types of people, but don't feel like you have to go out of your way to try and make them see that you're a great person. If they took the time to get to know you, they'd realize that. Duh, of course I mean mostly girls, but there's jackass guys out there too that need friends to walk all over."

I doubt he remembers this convo, but can I reiterate how much I love my family?

I'm digging this song right now - definitely time for some out with the old, and in with the new with many different people in (or at least, they are some of the time) my life right now.

http://youtu.be/1AJmKkU5POA

Thursday, Thursday, Thursday.

Considering I really don't post until later at night, this one is sort of random.

Got to the gym a few minutes ago only to realize that my iPod was dead... I really don't like working out without music, it just seems to keep me focused and my mind from wandering. It's a lot better than listening to the grunting of the guy on the squat rack next to me too. So, now I'm back home, going to grab some of the leftovers I made last night (healthy Plus+ penne noodles, marinara, steamed broccolo and asparagus, with diced fresh onions and tomatoes. Yeah, I love cooking.) Delish.

I'm leaving for Veishea tomorrow - I'll only be up there for a night but since I haven't attended since freshman year, it should be a good time.

In the realm of girls, they still confuse the shit out of me for the most part. Whatever, I guess i'll just do me and be myself - if that's not enough for someone then so be it. However, my step brother and his girlfriend did introduce me to one of their friends... we've been talking an awful lot lately and she's pretty much awesome. Too early to tell if there's something there, but I definitely enjoy talking to her.

Thats it for now. Time to hit next song on iTunes and see what pops up.

Dashboard. One of my favorite all-time bands. Carpe Diem peeps.

Wow.

"You seem quite nice for a girl with good looks

And I’m the kinda fellow that’ll make you feel better when your life gets shook
So give it a chance according to your plans
I bet I'm not number one on your list to kiss, but please understand "

So fitting, it's almost scary.

Chances

First and foremost - what a few weeks it's been. Andrew's bachelor party was incredible, and I was lucky enough to run into one of my very close friends from high school who I've fallen out of touch with over college. We went to prom together two years, and she was out on her bachelorette party as well. Small world.

The other part of my weekend was slightly more interesting. I've definitely come to find that I'm interested in a certain someone. My friends tell me how much they like her, but to be cautious because, well let's face it, they know me better than anyone and don't like seeing me unhappy. Regardless of how you perceive what it means when someone tells you, "Hey, I'm interested in you" In this situation, it's simply interested in getting to know her better, but there seems to be a wall there that's almost impossible to break through. I do see glimmers from time to time of her opening up, but I can tell she doesn't like talking about her feelings just as much as I don't.

It took a little bit of a leap for those words to come out of my mouth this weekend. The events that followed don't need to be rehashed, but they left me even more confused as I was before. This girl is completely and utterly complicated, hard to read, and a mystery... and I think that's why I'm so intrigued in wanting to know her for her. A close friend told me I was wasting my time - that things like this don't change, but there's something about her that leaves me wanting to know more of her story.

I'm just hoping for a chance. Even if it's for both of us to let our guards down for 5 minutes, I just want to learn what makes this girl tick.

This song fits me perfectly right now - and it just popped up on my playlist.

"Chances are the fascination

Chances won't escape from me
Chances are only what we make them
And all I need"

Here's to hoping she gives me one.

five for fighting - chances

time for action

You know, I've decided that I've spent more than enough time picking and choosing my battles. I can't just sit back and expect things to unfold the way I want them to without any effort. It's like my dad always told me, "If you want something bad enough, you have to fight for it."

Time to actually make an honest effort. If it gets thrown back in my face, I can at least pick myself up and be content with knowing that I tried. No 'what ifs' this time.

Here goes nothing.

iTunes song playing now - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C-OezHB6zQo&feature=fvwrel